about me Brian .C
05/04/91
Aries
LAW
DANCE
bluerubberball@hotmail.com
!being natural, beats any performing skill
archives
Monday, May 10, 2010 ___05:19
my actions may not show... i seem fine steady and cold... maybe its just that i do not know how to display and show concern, love, gratitude to you...the fear of you overpowers everything else since young that i just do not have that habit or im not used to it or maybe, even, im too coward to break through that barrier of the never-ending-cycle of inferiority and shame towards you.
but...
each time i walk towards my kitchen and see you sleeping on the sofa, posture, showing that that has been the most comfortable 'bed' you have ever slept for so long which in fact, your due 'bed' is supposed to be the soft, cosy and comfortable bed in the masterbedroom...
each time i walk back towards my room and see you sleeping on the sofa, my heart shakes, cracks and breaks...to see you snoring...to see you sleeping on something that could cause backaches and neck aches, for your age.. its not healthy to sleep so late, to sleep on such a thing, to smoke and drink so much coffee before your sleep, to fall asleep along with stress instead of the very thought of love and care you should be receiving from your wife and children...falling asleep without love...
the house is falling apart... a man... like you, of your calibre... has come to face such calamaties... i, as a son, could do nothing but just stand and watch.
i cannot continue typing any further...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Thursday, November 12, 2009 ___06:02
The Top of my Playlist:
The stars lean down to kiss you, And I lie awake I miss you, Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere. Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly, But I'll miss your arms around me I'll send a postcard to you dear, Cause I wish you were here.
I watch the night turn light blue, But it's not the same without you, Because it takes two to whisper quietly, The silence isn't so bad, Till I look at my hands and feel sad, Cause the spaces between my fingers Are right where yours fit perfectly.
I'll find opposing new ways, Though I haven't slept in two days, Cause cold nostalgia chills me to the bone. But drenched in Vanilla twilight, I'll sit on the front porch all night, Waist deep in thought because when I think of you. I don't feel so alone. I don't feel so alone. I don't feel so alone.
As many times as I blink I'll think of you... tonight. I'll think of you tonight.
When violet eyes get brighter, And heavy wings grow lighter, I'll taste the sky and feel alive again. And I'll forget the world that I knew, But I swear I won't forget you, Oh if my voice could reach back through the past, I'd whisper in your ear, Oh darling I wish you were here
-finally after 3 long years...ive found a reason to compose again. this song just makes me jealous, hope i can write better.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Saturday, October 31, 2009 ___08:55
You've loved me since the 10th grade, this I know now. But I was to absorbed in myself to see you as more than just a best friend. I broke your heart. You knew we would never be. You were always just the nice guy who was there for me whenever I needed a shoulder to cry on. I did love you, but not in the way you loved me. I took advantage of you, everyone was telling me it was so obvious that you loved me. But I wouldn't let myself see it, I blocked you out. We spent every day together in the summer going into our junior year and it continued into our junior year. We were inseparable. Then I'm not sure what started it but we started separating. Maybe you couldn't stand being just my best friend and only wanted to be my friend who was sometimes there. I'll never know. I got a boyfriend senior year and told you everything, maybe that was wrong of me. He hated when we were alone together because he knew you loved me, but I wouldn't let that separate us for good. Then you got a girlfriend. I hated her, but I told you she was cute and that I liked her. Slowly we started seeing each other less and less. Then I realized why I hated her so much. It was because I was so jealous of her. You started hanging out with only her friends and we never saw each other. Then freshman year came. We were both still in relationships. We would talk when we saw each other out at parties and have really good talks about our relationships. Mine was at the time going down hill and you helped me in a way just through our few talks. The summer going into our sophomore year I ended things with my boyfriend of 2 years, it was hard. But you were there for me. One night when we were drunk at a party I confessed to my friends that I loved you, i unconditionally loved you, more then I ever wanted to love someone. I loved you as a best friend and someone I was interested in. This made it even more dangerous. After this party I blocked out what i had confessed, but my friends will never forget it and never let me forget it. The summer went on and our relationship didn't change. We still never saw each other, you still had a girlfriend. Then 5 days ago I heard from a friend that your girlfriend had broken up with you. I immediately wanted to talk to you. But I couldn't because we are not the way we used to be and may never be that way again. I know she broke your heart and I am so sorry, I want nothing more than to be there for you right now. But I can't be. I can never tell you how I really feel. I cannot bring myself to risk such heartache of being denied. I cannot risk losing you as a friend. I need you in my life even if we aren't talking as much as we used to, we still can talk. And that is something I am not willing to give up. I love you, but I can never be with you. You don't love me the way you used to. And you never will because she broke your heart. Why didn't you tell me how you felt before? Why did you have to be the nice guy who couldn't step up to what he wanted?
-h
h...could you possibly be projecting with those last lines? let's change them around: "why didn't you tell him how you felt? why did you have to be the girl who couldn't step up to what she wanted?"
i think you need to go for it.
**from LeLove** what a joke...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Tuesday, October 20, 2009 ___19:05
Oooooh Put your loving hand out, baby I'm beggin
Beggin, beggin you Put your loving hand out baby Beggin, beggin you Put your loving hand out darling
Ridin' high, when I was king Played it hard and fast, 'cause I had everything Walked away, wonderin' then But easy come and easy go And it would end
So ah, any time I need ya, let me go Any time I feed ya, get me low Any time I see ya, let me know But I planted that seed, just let me go I'm on my knees when I'm (beggin) 'Cause I don't want to lose (you) I got my arms so spread And I hope that my heart gets fed Matter of fact, gonna beg
Beggin, beggin you Put your loving hand out baby Beggin, beggin you Put your loving hand out darling
I need you, (yeeah) to understand Tried so hard To be your man The kind of man you want in the end Only then can I begin to live again
An empty shell I used to be Shadow of my life Was hangin' over me A broken man But I don't know Won't even stand the devils chance To win my soul
What we doin'? What we chasin'? What about 'em, why da basement? Why we got good shit, don't embrace it? Why to feel for da need to replacement?
Ya' on a runway track from the good I want to paint in the pictures any way we could, react Like the heart in a trash where you should You done gave it away, ya' had it till you took it back But I keep walkin' on Keep rockin' dawns Keep walking forward Now the court is yours Keep browsin' halls 'Cause I don't wanna live in a broken home girl I'm beggin
Beggin, beggin you Put your loving hand out baby Beggin, beggin you Put your loving hand out darling
I'm fighting hard To hold my own I just can't make it All alone I'm holdin' on I can't fall back I'm just a con 'Bout to fade to black
Beggin, beggin you Put your love in hand out baby Beggin, beggin you Put your love in hand out darling
The harder that I try to do that, the more it backfires on me All the things growing up daddy had to see Daddy don't want you to see but you see just as much as he did We did not plan it to be this way, your mother and me But things have gotten so bad between us I don't see us ever being together ever again Like we used to be when we was teenagers But then of course everything always happens for a reason I guess it was never meant to be But it's just something we have no control over and that's what destiny is But no more worries, rest your head and go to sleep Maybe one day we'll wake up and this will all just be a dream
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Saturday, September 05, 2009 ___00:16
A reinvention of the original Oscar®-winning hit film, Fame follows a talented group of dancers, singers, actors, and artists over four years at the New York City High School of Performing Arts, a diverse, creative powerhouse where students from all walks of life are given a chance to live out their dreams and achieve real and lasting fame…the kind that comes only from talent, dedication, and hard work. In an incredibly competitive atmosphere, plagued by self-doubt, each student’s passion will be put to the test. In addition to their artistic goals, they have to deal with everything else that goes along with high school, a tumultuous time full of schoolwork, deep friendships, budding romance, and self-discovery. As each student strives for his or her moment in the spotlight, they’ll discover who among them has the innate talent and necessary discipline to succeed. With the love and support of their friends and fellow artists, they’ll find out who amongst them will achieve Fame.
The trailer looks amazing, lets hope this movie can live up to its trailer and impact people's lives. I'm looking forward to this one.
Get your drive going. Once it starts, it wont stop. I want mine to start and STOP SLEEPING! lol
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Monday, August 31, 2009 ___04:21
take a look at yourself in the mirror... who do you see looking back?
...is it the person you want to be? ...or is there someone else you were meant to be, the person you should have been but fell short of.
If someone telling you you cant or you wont, because you can...
Believe that love is out there... Believe that dreams come true everyday, because they do...
Sometimes happiness doesn't come from money, fame or power. Sometimes happiness comes from good friends and family and from the quiet nobility of leading a good life.
Believe that dreams come true everyday, because they do...
So take a look in that mirror and remind yourself to be happy, because you deserve to be...believe that
...and believe that dreams come true everyday, because they do.
-thankyou oth, well if it wasnt for you rebecca thankyou too...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, August 02, 2009 ___03:19
I thank my sister for this... Good and Simple reminder! :)
-->Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely
-->Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much
--> Remember that geat love and great achievements involve great risk
--> When you love, don't lose the lesson
--> Respect for self Respect for others Responsibility for all your actions
--> Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully
SUNTEC!!!! ARGH!!! ALONE-TIME!!!
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Monday, July 27, 2009 ___06:39
fear can hold you prisoner... hope, can set you free...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, July 19, 2009 ___01:56
while bathing today. and after watching abdc1. and reflecting myself for the past few months or years and visualisng ahead of whats gonna come at me...
ive derived this already known word: Conviction although i still prefer my M . A . D
if i wanna continue dancin? i gotta study. im not gonna use dance as an excuse for my studies. im not gonna use studyin as the reason for my dance. as like ive said before and time again constantly reminding myself or hav alr mentioned in my older posts. Dance and Study. i just have to als keep that in mind.
Conviction to every single thing you do in life... If i wanna dance? i gotta do my part for my studies. my devotion to the people who have put their trusts and belief in me. i cannot forget that and kick my that fuckin lazy ass of mine up. i cannot forget where i come from and where i wanna be. im going there...
when a dream and passion come along, you get your fate, your destiny and you life.
so like i said, im gonna dance and study.
be water my friend. when you put water in teacup, it becomes the teacup when you put water in a bottle, it becomes the bottle
when i am in school, i am studying when i am out school, i am dancing
be water my friend... from the late Bruce Lee. i just admire him man...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Friday, July 17, 2009 ___05:09
The word that i have been searching for...the proper definition that i have been looking for has finally dawned on me..
Catharsis
If you believe the impossible, the incredible can come true. Everything happens for a reason...keep believing...do what you love.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Thursday, July 09, 2009 ___20:30
Sad as i am over many and different issues, but looking back at it zooming out, i bet i'm not alone plus, they could be small issues compared to others...
Live Life to the Fullest
What aspects of life are you avoiding? Where do you hold yourself back out of fear of the unknown or past conditioning?
What experiences do you wonder about, long for and envy?
Your soul's purpose right now is to break out of your habitual self-identity and routine, and directly experience all that beckons you in life.
Your soul's lesson is, learn to have the courage to challenge yourself to the fullest and to pursue your passions without reservation. Earthly existence ends soon enough, so don't throw it away by keeping youtself from experiencing it to the hilt. Dream big and live large. This is your playground and you write the rules - don't sit on the sidelines watching the days go by...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, July 08, 2009 ___04:39
Although greiving of his passing.
I guess, he just gave and added on the drive and motivation to everyone whom has that dream they wanna acheive. Cause i felt that within me. I felt the hurt and sadness, not about his death, but it served as a reflection to my life and the situations, my Father...
Accept What Is
Right now your soul is helping you realize that the only way you can create the success you dream of in the physical world is by first mastering your inner world. The more disciplined you are in your responses, the more you'll acheive.
Begin by accepting life as it comes and not wasting time trying to control it. When you take charge of your negative emotinal reactions, you'll begin to tap in to your true Divine power. Trying to control the external world is as futile as trying to control the ocean
Your Soul's purpose right now is to respond in a grounded, non reactive manner to what life deals you, and take nothing personally - good or bad. Instead, focus on what you want to create in all circumstances.
Your Soul's lesson: Subdue all tempting negative emotional reactions, and stay connected to your Higher Self and Divine Spirit for guiDance. If you do so, you can gracefully point any situation in a direction that favour your good, and which benefits all concerned.
True and important indeed.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Tuesday, July 07, 2009 ___04:16
I am a person, who hates to lose. And if i ever lost, i am a person who would always fight back.
That is what i am applying to every aspect of my life, but i learned... that there are areas where this cannot happen...
relax and let go...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, July 05, 2009 ___01:03
Quietly Serve
are you feeling bored, restless, and tired of the "same old, same old"? are you bogged down with so many daily duties that you see no way to attend to your personal interests? Know that you're undergoing a time of intense personal transformation, when you ego is being confronted by your Higher Self and the Divine to grow into wisdom.
Your purpose is to... refine your instincts and temper your immature and self-centered tendencies in search of a more graceful expression of self.
Your lesson to learn is to... peacefully and joyfully accept the reoutine demands of your daily life with patience, love, and a willingness to serve. Embrae the wondrous gifts of each day by moving through it with elegance, ease, and determined grace. It isn't necessary to do great things to be fulfilled, but rather to do all the little necessary and often boring tasks of life with great love. This is the sign of true spiritual maturity.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, July 01, 2009 ___00:58
will miss you mj...
despite for the VERY FIRST mistake and small movements... i know where to improve on. my very first stage performance after so long...
sighs. thanks mum. for reminding me that this is not my niche. you just burned me alive.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Friday, June 26, 2009 ___07:30
His death just made me want to work harder and smarter to do my utmost best and cherish dance treasuring it as much while i am still breathing...
he still lives in our hearts... his music and videos still live on... his records and soul touched almost everyone in this world... he still lives on... truly lives up to his name although there were some ups n downs...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
___04:30
Master Class today - Rock's and Dino's Dope. Speechless. Just constantly motivating, driving and waking me up telling me where i am in dance, how far more...it is never ending in dance... Didnt had photo with Dino, too gangster, i scared. but he dope. he the man.
<-Rock,leng zai. Fellow hongkong-er. Theres so much in my head, like dreams and the what-ifs. shall not say here. not wont come true or later paiseh.
constant self-improvement is the only way to remain excellent
yeah. you ROCK my world. (the shirt he is wearing)
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, June 24, 2009 ___01:15
"You can't judge anyone by what they've done in the past, BECAUSE PEOPLE CHANGE" Leighton Meester
"Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the road worthwhile."
"Everyone needs to choose his own path" Yip Man
I wish i could be as dedicated and devoted as him. The same application towards dance. How about that?
DEVOTION
DEDICATION...
still mastering this two words
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, June 21, 2009 ___01:30
HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!
SIMILAR CASE THAT HAPPENS OR IS HAPPENING TO ME!
JAYCEE CHAN, THOUGH LOOKING SIMILAR, GOING THROUGH SIMILAR ISSUES TOO.
SIGHS~MOTHER FUCKING GOD~
I WILL B BIG IN SHOWBIZ ONE DAY TO BE ABLE TO MEET YOU.
I BELIEVE
A "Big Brother" who passionately shows the roots of showbiz to his juniors, Jackie Chan is different as a daddy.
Taking the education of his son, Jaycee, into his own hands, Chan instilled so much fear in his son that the latter would never dream of offending his dad for fear of the consequences. Chan said, "I've never taken care of my son nor sent him to school. For the first and only time that I went to pick him up from school, I went to the wrong one. I am not a good father but definitely a responsible one. My son is utterly afraid of me; he respects and listens to me. I don't think that I will be called a good daddy just by fetching my son to and from school. It's hard for someone like me. If I had sent him to school everyday, I don't think I will be who I am today."
He added, "There was once when I received a call from him while I was filming in Hengdian. You have to understand that he seldom calls me. And when he does, he is either asking for a ticket to watch the NBA match or that he has crashed my car.
"That day he called me to wish me Happy Father's Day! I sprouted some vulgarities and shouted at him: "Next time don't call me! Don't call me on Father's Day; don't call me on my birthday! Call me on usual days, do you get it?" And I hung up the phone immediately. I don't remember my parents' birthdays and I am not exceptionally nice only on Father's Day and Mother's Day. Everyday is like an occasion to me."
Last year, Jaycee told Xin.sg in an exclusive interview that he would be "digging his own grave" to be seeking his parents' advice on work issues. Ever since he was a child, his father only compliments him for one out of the hundred things he does.
Jaycee also said that he has a few of his father's songs in his car only for show and plays them when his dad is with him. On hearing this, Chan laughed, "If it's true, I'll slap him twice on his face when I return home."
Live Life the way you want it, where you want yourself to be, what you want to become, how you want to be, what you want to do, love to do.
You are what you are. You think like what you are. What will be will be. I have my Life to Live. I Live for MY Life.
YES MISTAKES BUT NO REGRETS ever...
There is only Guide, No Control. There is only Adaptation if you choose, No Succumb.
Conceive Believe Achieve -- ABC
constant MOTIVATION and do not be disheartened. Visualize, Manifest Positive thoughts (CONCEIVE - BELIEVE) you are driven. ACCELERATE towards it. (ACHIEVE) you love what you are doing, you are borned for this, what you truly love to do defines you..DEDICATE to it. --- MAD
LOVE LIFE. not DREAD LIFE Constant SURPRISES not Constant FIXED ROUTINES
i am sick and tired of what i should be or what i should do and how i should do. i have an opened mind, i am opened to suggestions, guidelines and ideas. and willing to consider and do them if it is of benefit to me. But never fixed statements or WANTS of other people. Using my life to fulfill other peoples needs. That is bullshit.
I am B.C.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, June 17, 2009 ___17:16
im more experienced now. lol. my previous posts? lame and childish. i only can seat back and laugh at it. eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
i didnt blog, i used it more of like a messenger. plus its public. urk. wtf was i thinkin. wad a joke.
eeeeee~! blogging is so... i gotta stop right now. cannot type another word.. lol
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Tuesday, June 16, 2009 ___06:12
im really glad... truly is wonderful to have faith. especially now, being more fateful to pray and faithful to Buddha as well as discipline in Buddhism, doing and trying my best. He answered... Only while bathing did i realise...since X is X, only today did 3 of them talked to me, J-A-S accordingly. Have i been blind? or? I'm not alone after all...
I have just been beating myself up and being stupid. Open my eyes, open my mind and enjoy life. Truly shocking.
I HAVE IPMAN IN CANTO VERSION PLUS ENGLISH SUBTITLE!!! HOW DOPE IS THAT? this is steaming...
okay! seriously! im gonna put an end to blogging for awhile! GOODBYE!
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Monday, June 15, 2009 ___05:41
Just finished The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. I am speechless after the movie. Simply excellent, the feeling is more than what the word 'touching' can describe. It truly protrayed what Love is, can happen and can do.
My god, i choose not to think too much but, why are these movies coming at such a time? should i say good or bad? what do they mean? the signs in these movies. Don't blame me, i am a man of faith.
I would be going out with my mum and sister later today, planned a list of activities, hope i would have an excellent time with them. Be it rain or shine, i have plans for whichever were to happen. But i hope, it wouldn't rain as...
although i'm moving on with life and time, somehow, somewhere, that part of me, is still frozen in/at that time.
didnt had a good sleep last night, tossing and turning, stomach growling... woke up, read and wrote stuff until dad went to bed before i could sneak into the kitchen to fulfil my need, lol and i watch Traitor (again another movie about terrorism). Slept at 8am? woke up at 10am? with just 2 hours of sleep, i was tired but i pressed on through the whole day for i... have bought my new mp4. yp-p3, much much better than my previous yp-p2. really happy but at the price of my hard-earned money. I lost my previous one, where my uncle gave it to me. sighs.
Anw, I gotta remember to do my work, Dance & Degree... not forgetting family too.
I love you Dad, I love you Uncle. I am still trying...and i would achieve it. Im waiting...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, June 14, 2009 ___01:33
which is why be it good or bad, even with sixth sense and feelings people can never truly understand you based on what they saw...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, June 10, 2009 ___06:39
Brian given name Gender: Male Meaning: Hill, strong, noble, and high Origin: Ireland
Brian is a male forename of CelticIrish origin. Its original meaning is not known for certain but it is possibly related to the Old Celtic element bre, meaning hill, or by extension high and/or noble.[1] One of the earliest persons to bring fame to this name was Brian Boru, an ancient Irish high king who thwarted Viking attempts to conquer Ireland in the 11th century. His army was victorious in the Battle of Clontarf, but he was slain. The Irish O'Brien clan, one of the most common surnames in Ireland, takes their name from him.
Someday, it would be updated with a new name, Brian Cheok (b 1991) famous artiste / lawyer
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Monday, June 08, 2009 ___00:31
haha. when i say fated, means really fated. or just plain meant to be.
ive longed to watch He's just not that into you in the cinemas but no one to watch with and no chance to too. was no longer in the cinemas when i got back from beijing. longed for the dvd to be released, but till now, its not out longed for it to be uploaded on the net, but it was not out and only recently when i can dwl movies online, i managed to dwl it.
and i only after recent incidents, then i got to watch it. ha. so meant to be eh?
that movie, saved me... or rather, healed me. heh
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, May 31, 2009 ___19:38
像两首节拍不同的歌 xiang liang shou jie pai bu tong de ge
Akin to two songs with different rhythms,
却又同时被爱情合奏 que you tong shi bei ai qing he zou
but at the same time being meld together by love -
旋律勉强着 xuan lv mian qiang zhe
The melody is forced.
愉快不能够假装快乐 yu kuai bu neng gou jia zhuang kuai le
Contentment is no substitute for happiness.
你心中有宽阔的天空 ni xin zhong you kuan kuo de tian kong
Your heart is as vast as the boundless sky,
但空气好稀薄 dan kong qi hao xi bo
But the air is too thin to breathe.
曾经以为等待会改变什么 ceng jing yi wei deng dai hui gai bian shen me
I used to think that waiting would change things,
你总会属于我 ni zong hui shu yu wo
That you would eventually belong to me.
但是最后时间证明了 dan shi zui hou shi jian zheng ming le
But in the end, time proved that -
你只喜欢我 ni zhi xi huan wo
You only liked me as a friend.
你说我比较像你的好朋友 ni shuo wo bi jiao xiang ni de hao peng you
You said that I'm more like your best friend,
只是不小心拥抱着 zhi shi bu xiao xin yong bao zhe
And we accidentally hugged together.
你道歉 你难过 ni dao qian ni nan gup
You apologised, you were sad,
于是我给你笑容 yu shi wo gei ni xiao rong
Hence I brought a smile to your face.
谁在乎我的心还会不会寂寞 shui zai hu wo de xin hai hui bu hui ji mo
Who cares if my heart is lonely?
如果爱情是五线谱 ru guo ai qing shi wu xian pu
If love is a staff [chinese musical instrument],
我只希望用全音符 wo zhi xi wang yong quan yin fu3
I only hope to use the full range of musical notes,
吟唱出爱上你 yin chang chu ai shang ni
To sing that I have fallen in love with your,
那完整的幸福 na wan zheng de xing fu
Happiness that is so complete.
当你的心没有耳朵 dang ni de xin mei you er duo
Regard your heart as being without ears,
即使我为你唱这歌 ji shi wo wei ni chang zhe ge
For even if I sang this song for you,
你也只看见我哭了 ni ye zhi kan jian wo ku le
You would only see me crying.
你说我比较像你的好朋友 ni shuo wo bi jiao xiang ni de hao peng you
You said that I'm more like your best friend,
只是不小心拥抱着 zhi shi bu xiao xin yong bao zhe
And we accidentally hugged together.
你道歉 你难过 ni dao qian ni nan gup
You apologised, you were sad,
于是我给你笑容 yu shi wo gei ni xiao rong
Hence I brought a smile to your face.
谁在乎我的心还会不会寂寞 shui zai hu wo de xin hai hui bu hui ji mo
Who cares if my heart is lonely?
曾经以为等待会改变什么 ceng jing yi wei deng dai hui gai bian shen me
I used to think that waiting would change things,
你总会属于我 ni zong hui shu yu wo
That you would eventually belong to me.
但是最后时间证明了 dan shi zui hou shi jian zheng ming le
But in the end, time proved that -
你只喜欢我 ni zhi xi huan wo
You only liked me as a friend.
你说我比较像你的好朋友 ni shuo wo bi jiao xiang ni de hao peng you
You said that I'm more like your best friend,
只是不小心拥抱着 zhi shi bu xiao xin yong bao zhe
And we accidentally hugged together.
你道歉 你难过 ni dao qian ni nan gup
You apologised, you were sad,
于是我给你笑容 yu shi wo gei ni xiao rong
Hence I brought a smile to your face.
谁在乎我的心还会不会寂寞 shui zai hu wo de xin hai hui bu hui ji mo
Who cares if my heart is lonely?
你说我是你最好的朋友 ni shuo wo shi ni zui hao de peng you
You said that I'm your best friend,
却不应该再拥抱着 que bu ying gai zai yong bao zhe
But we shouldn't hug anymore.
你退缩 你冷漠 ni tui suo ni leng mo
You withdrew, you grew colder,
于是我放开双手 yu shi wo fang kai shuang shou
Hence I withdrew my embrace.
不在乎我的心 bu zai hu wo de xin
Without concern that my heart,
会永远更寂寞 hui yong yuan geng ji mo
Would be even lonelier forever.
i bth lzx...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Saturday, May 30, 2009 ___04:15
ive really decided to stay strong, stay strong and really stay strong and focussed...
to quit it...
why?
Live it UP without Lighting UP! i want to quit it...
by continuing, il be letting first of all, myself down, second my mum, third my dance
many more but these are my main concern.
i want to and i will. after these last lucky 6 (luk). good sign. il breathe them good, to remember...and to never ever ever tocuh them again.
somehow, the more i think, im more confused & puzzled. also, its unhealthy in a way... guess i should tone it down and stop giving u and myself ideas...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Thursday, May 28, 2009 ___06:58
you know, it finally dawned on me that i have to fight for my passion.
Indeed, I definately have to do dance along with work and school. I cannot run away from it. I have to juggle all three together. It's part of life. I have to fight and win my passion.
Other people can do it, why cant i. seriously. nbcb, but itl be fucking tiring but fucking worthwile and orgasmic.
Imagining myself in University, the school load would be heavier, i'll be independent with my own finances, the dance scene would be much competitive and by that age, i want to be some where enjoying my dance, BUT I PRAY, by that time, il be using dance to support my finances instead of working to support both my dance and school. PLUS! im a guy, if i were to go overseas, it would be another 3-4 more years, im definately getting a bike, i hope.
The point is, i should not be complaining but forcing myself to adapt to it instead. Given all problems or circumstances, i should train myself to handle whatever comes well. Really, i feel really childish moaning and whining bout problems i face, not bad. Another sign of maturity. Once again, stil polishing my Discipline to the best i can. Face and Erase Problems. my new motto.
Lastly, BRIAN! Can you please be more responsible towards people? Regardless how busy or how problematic you are, this is this, that is that, prioritise, be punctual and responsible. How to go far if continue like that? tsk tsk tsk.
[The Smiths cover]
Stop me, oh, stop me Stop me if you think that you've Heard this one before Stop me, oh, stop me Stop me if you think that you've heard this one before
Nothing's changed I still love you, oh, I still love you ...Only slightly, only slightly less than I used to, my love
I was delayed, I was way-laid An emergency stop I smelt the last ten seconds of life I crashed down on the crossbar And the pain was enough to make A shy, bald, buddhist reflect And plan a mass murder Who said lied I'd to her ?
Oh, who said I'd lied because I never ? I never ! Who said I'd lied because I never ? I was detained, I was restrained And broke my spleen And broke my knee (and then he really laced into me) Friday night in Out-patients Who said I'd lied to her ?
Oh, who said I'd lied ? - because I never, I never Who said I'd lied ? - because I never
Oh, so I drank one It became four And when I fell on the floor ... ...I drank more
Stop me, oh, stop me Stop me if you think that you've Heard this one before Stop me, oh, stop me Stop me if you think that you've heard this one before
Nothing's changed I still love you, oh, I still love you ...Only slightly, only slightly less than I used to, my love
Set free me why don't you Get out my life why don't you Cause you don't really love me, no You just keep my hanging on
Set me free why don't you girl Get out my life girl Cause you don't really love me, no, no You just keep my hanging on
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, May 24, 2009 ___03:43
STUDY! NO JOKE! COMMIT TTM! CLEAR DEBT - WORK! STOP DANCE TILL THE ABOVE IS CLEARED! -INORDER TO DANCE LIGHT-HEARTEDLY AND PURSUE FULL-FLEDGED!
really lettin dance down right now, but i will make it up to it once all problems are solved.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Saturday, May 23, 2009 ___03:20
I fail to manage myself well.
thats what i need to conquer before even thinking about Dance or attaining my Degree.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
___00:32
really pissed and disappointed with myself laaaaaaa!
i cannot handle with myself with too little sleep, i would jus ko. but theres so many things to do with so little time...ccb
damn sian eh. other people can do it. why cant i? damn disgusted that i cannot do both well at the same time. do dance, cant commit as much to studies. Study alot, there aint really time to dance. ccb. argh.
Prioritise already leh. i think is because i sway. too many things happening that clashes. Especially my losses, tryin to find jobs etc. eats alot of time.
argh fuck it! must pull through this term.. holidays faster come. need time to reshuffle again.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Thursday, May 21, 2009 ___03:22
H3 - one word - DOPE by Grupo de Rua (Brazil): http://www.grupoderua.com/grn/grupo_de_rua_de_niteroi.html
check them out. If only their more english based, they'd be a hit in the industry.
Bad stuff before the good one first. I'm still fucking annoyed and pissed with myself that I still cannot fight my problem of waking up. Why can people have so little sleep yet wake up on their own and on time. Shucks. When i sleep, il just end up like a zombie dead to anything around me until my body automatically charges up with the amount of sleep needed, and im awake. But that cannot do!!! I have to find a way to break it. Wake up as an when i need and want. I am the master, my body is the pupil. Im sorry Mum, to have kept you waiting. argh! it sucks!!!
I really have to thank my mum proper, she gave this great opportunity for me. I love you mum. For supporting and believing me in Dance. Will do you proud. ASAP :D haha.
Now the good stuff, this is it. Im surprised that Secondary schools are trying to spread HipHop too, as an Art. look like its really up and coming. Seriously. By the time im 20 odd. Itl be all over and youths would be taking it over. mwhahaha! Saw hell lot of secondary school students at the show. Hell am i jealous, didnt had such an opportunity during my time otherwise id be way ahead right now. Esp. Sec Schs from the east.
Anyhow, i went for Grupo de Rua at Victoria Theatre. Awesome!
Singapores dance is really way behind. Come on Singapura! Push on and we shall breakthrough! GR totally smoked RF. a thousand to ten. lol.
Lastly, my honour to have pictures taken with 2 poppers. My style of dance.
Me and Willow
Me and Danilo. woot
[Danilo] Teacher, dancer and choreographer of urbane dances. Founder and integrant of Under Crew (Group of inquiries and performances). First one of the instructors of Ragga Jam in Brazil certified by Laure Courtellemont (France). It administered classrooms in International Street Dance Kemp, in Czech Republic and in Studio Bounce, of Andrea Von Gunten, in Switzerland. It works with shows, events, parties, shows and jams sessions. In 2008 it entered for the Group of Street and began the international run through the show "H3".
Sighs, did not had the opportunity to meet Bruno Duarte, i suppose he was the guy during the performance doing some LA hiphop. sweeet.
[Bruno Duarte] Born in the Maranhão on the 26th of November of 1986, it obtained several rewards in festivals and you battle inside and out of Brazil. Fez breaks of the Groups Breakdown Rio, Project Dance 2XS, Cenarium Cia of Dance and of Spoudaios Cia of Dance. It did classrooms with important names of the dance of street in the world between them Buddha Stretch, Brooklyn Terry, Mr. Wiggles, Bboy Lilou, Brian Green and Dom Campbell. In 2008 it administered classrooms in Street Dance Kemp, in Prague - Czech Republic. It showed up in several television programs. Integrant of the Group Xstyle Dance Company. It did presentations in shows and displays with the show “It +” from the Quasar it rows backwards of dance. Also it was sworn in important battles of Hip Hop dance in the Rio de Janeiro. From 2008 he is a ballet dancer of the Group of Street with whom it began the international run with the show "H3".
Anyhow, still a long way to go in Dance. On the right path i hope. :) 5 more years...5 more years...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, May 20, 2009 ___01:09
I've finally got a tool that can organise my life. An Organiser! But i must make sure i really use it well or else it defeats the purpose and wastes my money. so i hope i will be as organised and be less lost and ill disciplined as before.
Anyway, you're right. In our daily life, we all somehow have to put on an act. But once we're behind closed doors, you're free to be able to be your true self. And it all comes back to you.
So what if emo? Better to have some outlet and sulk as much as you want till you're sick of it. And itl be over...so,
ive made up my mind with 2 D's as my purpose and drive. Degree Dance
I like dwelling into the music, imagining and feeling it. only then can one really appreciate it which i believe everyone does in their softspot and comfort zone. In another sense, it helps me to practice my expression for dance by feeling the song. Anyways, this song by LZX, i really give props to him. Its good because its so simple. Equivalent to what goes around comes around / cry me a river by JT.
Artistes and singers who knows how to sing and produce love songs does not mean that they know how to love. Yet,we (non-singers / artistes)know how to actually love and sing love songs but somehow we do not know how to put our feelings into words.
這首為你點播的歌 zhe shou wei ni dian bo de ge This is a song I selected for you
如果我先哭了 怎麼唱到最後 ru guo wo xian ku le zen me chang dao zui hou If I were to cry first, how will I be able to finish it?
是的 感情不是K歌 shi de gan qing bu shi K ge Yes..relationships aren't like karaoke
音階一字不漏不見得感動 yin jie yi zi bu lou bu jian de gan dong A romantic song isn't about the perfect pitch or lyrics
我也懂 拿mic的手不能顫抖 wo ye dong na mic de shou bu neng chan dou I do know, the hand holding the mic should not tremble
曾握著 就能感受你比我難過 ceng wo zhe jiu neng gan shou ni bi wo nan guo By holding your hand, I could sense your sadness worse than mine
誰寫的 歌詞那麼適合放手 shui xie de ge ci na me shi he fang shou The lyrics written is only suitable for a breakup
我怎能捨不得 wo zen neng she bu de How can I bear to?
我努力唱完主歌 我忘了走音沒有 wo nu li chang wan zhu ge wo wang le zou yin mei you I strive to finish this song. I forgot if I went off pitch.
我到底哭什麼 哭什麼 明明搞笑的 wo dao di ku shen me ku shen me ming ming gao xiao de What the hell am I crying for? Crying for? When it was obviously just a joke.
我努力唱好朋友 我忘了是誰哭了 wo nu li chang hao peng you wo wang le shi shui ku le I diligently sing "good friends." I forgot who was crying.
就算你不記得 這首歌 唱完的 是我 jiu suan ni bu ji de zhe shou ge chang wan de shi wo Even if you forget that I was the one who finished singing this song.
[back to top]
我努力唱完這歌 我忘了破音沒有 wo nu li chang wan zhe ge wo wang le po yin mei you I strive to finish this song. I forgot if my pitch broke.
你心理觸動的 下一首 已經不是我 ni xin li chu dong de xia yi ge yi jing bu shi wo Though it touched your heart. The next song will no longer be by me.
我努力唱到嘶吼 我不怕剩我一個 wo nu li chang dao si hou wo bu pa sheng wo yi ge I sung till I was screaming. I'm not afraid of being the only one left.
只要你能記得 這首歌 給我最 愛的 zhi yao ni neng ji de zhe shou ge gei wo zui ai de As long as you can remember, this song is for the one I love most...
Surprised that I was able to translate the song. Not bad...which is a good thing because my chinese cannot suck any further already otherwise its really humliating. Not bad if this has an english version but i doubt itl b suitable in english. heh, but worth a try. CHEH! English version by ZZM. wa. damn cool if i hear my song on radio while, say... , im at Mac slacking or while cutting my hair in the salon. cheh cheh! lame. -.-. but dare to dream. others can go ahead and laugh. but who cares? its yours not theirs.
Time to put my mask back on... CHEH CHEH! step emo only..
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Monday, May 18, 2009 ___02:18
"Next, when somebody harms you, practice forgiveness. Then there is no habouring that person in your heart. So you bring peace. That's how you bring peace from one person to another like this. you bring world peace. That is very, very important.
Then if one does some mistake, say some bad or angry words or whatever, immediately apologise. Again, there is no grudge holding you or others. Again, you can bring world peace.
Also, if the mind has sunk down and it is difficult to practice, then you must meditate on death and impermanence. That is very important. It takes care of so many problems, solves everything. It cuts attachment to people, places, and things. You stop clinging. If you think that you are going to die today then you wont waste time."
-adapted by Lama Zopa Rinpoche from the Newsletter of (A)mitabha (B)uddhist (C)entre
Maybe my earlier post was just letting off steam, but i just thought that you could show more concern rather than just cycling off or when seeing me in such a state, you seem like you just couldnt be bothered at that momement.
Whatever it is, its over... Its too god damn lame to be like that. lol. go back to normal. but you too, you knw that you have to fucking change too.
Pls oh Pls may it b good this time.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
___00:13
enough set backs, enough negative emotions.
enough is enough. gonna remember this scar, pick myself up and never to fall that way again. or rather, never to fall down.
two things now set in my mind to acheive. NOthing to hold me back. but ofcourse not neglecting my family.
you only played a small part in this, the large part are my own personal problems. dont be affected by this, go on with what you knw you need to do.
enough is enough. thats it. enough wake up calls. sighs. how many do i need?
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, May 13, 2009 ___21:52
im surprise ppl stil view my blog. which is nothing to rejoice about because there are blog stalkers who actually read ppl's blog and bad mouth.
eh. whoever read and dun understand wad im actually talking about, pls dun infer and cock up ur own story and bad mouth. nbcb. make me find out who the fuck u are. u knn ccb die. i fucking chidlish now, because i cannot stand this kind of slug.
jus die _|_
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Friday, May 08, 2009 ___13:03
"You should have confidence in whatever good qualities and skills you have and use them courageously, but you shouldn't feel arrogantly proud of them"
His Holiness the Dalai Lama
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, May 03, 2009 ___04:17
cb la. everyone is like moving forward.
Me? pulled and held down by problems.
Nabeh. is not i want to emo. but is really damn jiat.
And i find my life boring already. sighs. i think i should make it even more boring by fixing my life up to a pattern to numb myself and move forward silently.
Who knows?
Gonna TRY and express and channel all these negatives feelings out into something that can be shared and appreciated...
(*SIGHS*)
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, April 29, 2009 ___03:44
Life is not always smooth
You're constantly in battle with life against the decisions and choices you choose or have to make.
Well, AGAIN, thats what makes life exciting but FUCK!. One wrong move or jus when things start to turn dark. You feel lost and everything like. Why is everything going wrong? thats where u stuggle to find yourself once again. Gather the will and strength within you. And thats where you know what kind of person you are. How strong and smart you are. Reflections through meditations.
I hope, and i know, i can pull through this and get back on the running track. Battle with temptations and remain in the fort of Discipline to keep myself away from harm even though the grass is greener outside but yet opened to danger.
Somehow, i hesitate, I always consider myself the risk-taker, never the safe player because you never know till you try. Not taking the risk is the greatest risk. You wont know what youl be missing out on. Sighs, thats where you have to really consider which is which, what is what. And take your next step.
I hope his there guiding me still, opening my eyes to new things. I need you with me constantly. Time is running out on my side, with the aims and ambitions. This is no time to rest. I have to get back on track. But i need the time to recollect myself after all the happenenings, they're just not smooth. Fuck. Fuck Fuck. i have to lay and build my own path.
Nil Sine Labore.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, April 22, 2009 ___05:46
Another important chapter in my life, which i feel it deserves me blogging and penning it down to remember it for the rest of my life. This is the day that i got myself burnt from betting. Yes, it was profitable at start or rather the first half of the year, but as time went by, the greed escalated, the commitment on my expenses increases thus the giant leap in my stakes. This caused my downfall along with my over-confidence in bets that I'll place. One thing for sure that i have learned about betting, there is no such thing as "high-chance or high-possibility". The Ball is round. Remember that, anything can happen. The bookmakers have their way of controlling the game. Thus the best is just to watch out of enjoyment and not have money involved at all. Just plainly Passion in Football.
Due to Betting, i have caused grievous hurt not only to my bank account, to myself but also to the people around me. Whom love, care, and most important of all, trusts me. Which i broke it in just a snap of my fingers. All 6 months of constant hard work and steadiness went to vain in just a snap. Reflecting and thinking back of what I've done and what I've caused to my loved ones, disgusts me. I shall never again, lay a finger on gambling. Anything and everything that has regards to gambling or the easy risk of my financial status over something that is not worth risking for. I shall now convert my self to a quarter of a Muslim. As they are not allowed to gamble due to their religion restriction.
I took a whole day to get myself out of that nervous shock or rather break-down. The fear just engulfs me, in thinking of the amount that i have to pay up as well as to those whom i am in debt with. After long walks, long talks with friends and constant blast of my favourite songs from my mp3 while on the way home. They enlightened me the good point in facing all this shit at this point of time as this allows me to look forward to a better life in future, plainly focusing on my dance and studies where i will be free from such gambling and burden whereby i can lead a healthy lifestyle too, free from money worry and stress.
I can fairly say that this is the lowest point in my entire life, with regards to the amount that i have lost. Fear of not being able to face the music with my father adding on to that would be the approaching deadline for my dance competition which i promised Audrey as well as myself to do well in this dance, at least put in an amount of effort where we would not regret not trying.
Also, I have decided to write, compose or sing songs, lyrics or creation of dance moves and this point, being able to be in such a plight would allow me to be rich in words of this kind of situation that i am facing. I should spend time thinking and having more soul searching, going within me, discovering whatever I'm feeling or thinking and taking the effort of converting it into music, moves, lyrics or words or poems or anything that would be good to reminisce. Basically, produce it into an Art, Music or Dance where it could be appreciated and shared with people of same experience or sentiments and feelings.
How can i ever repay my Dad? I'm desperate to find a job now. any job, anything, as long as it's a night job and cash is coming in. And i can repay the debts I'm owing. Rahim and Jae, I'm desperately hoping that you could be able to provide me a job at Music Garage where i can be working to earn back the money through working with something that i love and am passionate for. Dance. It would be around me, it would motivate me even more and it gives me the opportunity to practice and be with it more. I would be happy. I know at least it would not stray me further away from my goal. I would really treasure if it does come. I would fight for it. I need it.
Never would i ever make myself get into such a position ever again. I will never try to be over-confident and always stay cautious in whatever i do.
No more stress I'm finally Straight Now I get it. Now I take the time to think Before I make mistakes for my family's sake.
That part of me left yesterday The heart of me is strong today No regrets I'm blessed to say, the old me, dead and gone away.
you know, sometimes do you ever wonder if were too blinded by our everyday things? be it school, ur piano lessons, ur cca, remedials, basically activities that just keep u busy day after day after day that makes you feel like youre a hamster running the mill.
days go by so quickly that the next thing you know, uve reached the holidays, your holidays have ended.
so blinded, that we actually take those things that are close to us, whom are close to us, things that we see, use, or whatever, you name it. And take things for granted. have you? well. i have. and im glad i realised it.
for i would put in effort daily and constantly to cherish and appreciate it. well, im a singaporean, the part of my life now definately would have to be a cycle, otherwise, things would just be too risky.
how i wished that i could go away, lead a life looking forward to each unexpected day, filled with different activities. really living out life to the fullest.
where am i to go in 2years down the road. Army LA! lame! sorry sorry. i mean where am i to go in 5 years time? have i realised my actual passion? do i even have a dream to pursue? have i laid out a plan to go far?
IF SO...i wanna work hard. or rather, actually start from this moment onwards is the dream of myself to be practtical? good step to improve my dance.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Saturday, March 07, 2009 ___02:09
birthday wish (lol):
1. hoodie 2. black cap 3. nicer and cooler and efficient wallet 4. nice bracelet 5. new batch of blings
ciao!
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Thursday, January 15, 2009 ___21:19
What is your True Fear?
Your Result: Where Your life is Going
You are a very determined and willful individual. You have strong set goals that you plan to reach no matter what. You may be an overachiever at times but that's because you want to be successful in your life. The greatest accomplishment for you is when you reach a high goal. However, you constantly worry if you're not good enough to do something, or if your life doesn't go according to plan. You worry a lot about your future, and if it will meet all your high criteria. Don't worry, with your determination, and hard work ethic, and organization chances are things will go according to plan.
please click on the video before reading my blog, like that then got atmosphere. ;) been a long time since i touched the guitar, il teach u guitar after A's (: a promise that would be kept.
one more week to constant dance training. YES! and i jus want to session more. passion4dance, but no proper and private place to practice when theres no dance lesson sighs
2009,a new year ahead. time to get my thoughts right, put the past behind me,learn the lessons that should be learnt from '08 and ofcourse a much more solid attempt to change for the better which i have not been doing after knowing the negatives about me for so long. (new year resolutions' kept secret) main focus: 1) studying 2)dance 3)soccer 4)guitar p.s. not in order. all must good. yijiibang
wad a 2008, (typical compo sentence) in a blink of an eye, a semester for poly gone. 2008 was pretty much a lost period for me, alot of changes and new exposures. but yet, adventurous and fun. i must specifically say, 2008 was a very sleepy and lazy year for me. lol
been eons since a fun trip to sentosa. finally a proper outing, not chalet, not biathlon/x-country/marathon/, not camping and not camping... only had a proper outing there during toddler days with family. sighs. think its up to me to make my family bonded once more and solve the problems within. 2009 what lies ahead is uncertain, like the "forest" infront of me, but it is that that makes it exciting. thick and dense as it is, makes it difficult for me to reach my goals, but that is what that makes it satisfying. and i hope, every once in a while i would bump into a fruit while in the "forest" which would allow me to persevere on..know why? so that my 2009 would end up as a fruitful one. lame kalipok. jiat. my entrance into the "forest" is greeted with a big aunty's ass. what does it represent for me in the early weeks of 2009? lame kalipok.
be it, childish,happy,angry,lame,emo posts, been through alot with you... but one of my new year resolution is- You've matured and turned manly therefore no more blogging ever again.
goodbye surfer dude who can no longer tame a girl,il miss you...(means no girlfriend for very very long time. i think that is what will happen to me)
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, December 28, 2008 ___15:12
my blogs abit screwed right now. think its time for a new skin. lol. anw, wad for sia. who got read my blog? but for those faithful and loyal fans. i will. (: and for my fans, finally the post youve been waiting for. an emo post!!
as ive said before and a thousand times over. your heart and mind must click.
ive been lying to my heart and following my head...sighs. no no no no no~ its wrong. they didnt click, so end up? bad bad bad bad bad~ so now. i will follow my heart and force my head to follow my heart, then will click.
okay. whatever youve jus read. jus read only... is damn lame, cause is super broken english comin from a student in Law.
basically, the above meant, when i wasnt financially able to buy the (high-in-demand) boot i wanted, i ngeh-ngeh (insisted and perservered)want to buy. NOW, even if financially unstable but now not high-in-demand (but boot is stil very beautiful to me) and the boots not sold out. i stop ngeh-ngehing. why sia. should i als follow wad they say? when deep down inside of me, i stil want that boot so badly? or do i not?
even so. i need to have the money ready by then.
and i bet u guys feel uve read a ton of rubbish above. nvm, is my blog, i understand can already its meaningful.
so basically wad ive said above is (laugh pls, dun feel irritated) just perservere mah. why stop? theres no wrong to keep trying.
ok now serious part. il do up a serious new year resolution. (pls dun think i wont follow la. mus hlp me think positively!)
i spent my christmas slping the whole day through. [(Y) <-- good-hand sign in msn] best way to celebrate christmas.
thats all for now. man, cant believe it. another year is passing soon.
jialat, my england more n more like jun qun.
HAVE A NICE DAY! (qun, laugh pls :)
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Friday, December 26, 2008 ___01:51
All I Want For Christmas Is Us by Jason Mraz
What to give the girl who has everything All i want for christmas you Here’s my list I checked it twice Wasn’t good, wasn’t bad I was naughty and nice. Had my eye on you all year long And now i know fo sho I wouldn’t even have to try you on No need for gift return
It’s going to be a cold winter But i wont need the heat to keep me warm As long as you wrap yourself around me On christmas morning Whether it’s now or later So long as it’s before you go, you know My love is always in your favor And now you know that All i want for christmas... Is...
Sweet like a candycane Hanging from the tree I will stripe you red and green When you hit me like a sugar rush No care for the other stuff This season you’re all that i need They say wishing for you Is like wishing for snow in southern california But you know that i can prove them all wrong Cause my love is true I simply adore you
It’s going to be a cold winter But i wont need the heat to keep me warm As long as you wrap yourself around me On christmas morning Whether it’s now or later As long as it’s before you go, you know My love is always in your favor And now you know that All i want for christmas... Is...
Can’t say that i’ve been good all year But i’ve been making resolutions to get you here And if it means being better than whatever, no sweat Well i bet my halls that i deck for the cause And santa claus, he knows what my intentions are Even dismissing mistle toe So i get to know ya, first of all Singing oh my god You’re the reason that i decorate my yard
It’s going to be a cold winter But i wont need the heat to keep me warm As long as you wrap yourself around me On christmas morning Whether it’s now or later Got to tell you before you go, know that My love is always in your favor And now you know that All i want for christmas... All i want for christmas... All i want for christmas is us.. All i want for christmas is us...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, December 17, 2008 ___03:19
lol. its true. girls are my weakness. being too affectionate will harm you. must be balanced =)
just wait till the right one comes.
Ip-Man. faster start. 2 more days!
once again, distraction, distracted...
and another time to gather myself and move on...to my objective, in life, and whatever i wanna b and look forward to.
the older you get, the more things you gotta face and handle. psst...its worse if u have hell lot of friends..
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Monday, December 15, 2008 ___08:57
tell you first, i dont like to blog bout my daily life. jus detest the thought of myself staring at the ceiling wondering wad i have done today infront of the computer screen thinking on what to type. erk.
why do these feelings erupt again? its so long ago...
love/infatuation/like/ w/e. is forever wierd. once bitten twice shy. however, unconciously still searching for it, or hungry for it. but yet again, too busy with oneself. sometimes i wonder, do the partner we need have to be that perfect? why think of all the unecessary flaws? like the feeling of being irked...why would we think this and cause us to feel this way? why cant we just accept the way it is.
LOL. been so long since i blog such emo stuff. cheh. improving.
learnt a new lesson in my part-time job. this job not easy siol. i want my money back. guys. doing good doesnt mean good will come back. not doing anything wrong = to doing something good. remember. so you dont have to specifically do something good. just dont do anything wrong.
IP MAN. faster start. must start re-structuring and re-organizing stuff.
like i said, i like oldies...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Monday, December 08, 2008 ___06:44
why like that sia. to ask or not to ask.
just wait. just wait. no harm to rush. sian...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Thursday, December 04, 2008 ___00:15
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY!!! ALTHOUGH IM 15MINS LATE. ><
anyway, life has full of turning corners, and i like that. this theory is so true. what's that big thing awaiting for me?
to be part of Singapore's Law Constituency or become a star and appear on MTV? heh heh..nothing is impossible. although unrealistic, but nothing wrong to dream big.
eh. faster come to my corner lei. 3 years liao. bth.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Monday, December 01, 2008 ___23:51
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Tuesday, November 04, 2008 ___00:10
brian... your heart and mind have to click. only then will things work for you. understand?
be water my friend. if you put water in a cup, it becomes the cup, you put it in a jug, it becomes the jug. water can crash violently and water can flow serenely. be water my friend.
to express oneself is harder than to impress and so on. express dont impress.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Friday, October 31, 2008 ___08:52
Never Never Ever Back Down.
and one more thing. breathe.
the outcome is within your control.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Monday, October 20, 2008 ___02:04
there's no other way than to say goodbye...
i hope this is the final time for all this nonsense. its happened so many times, been threatened so many times, hurt so many times. PLUS, it always happens at the wrong time. Till, im immune to it.
just end it. hurting to see. but end it.
tsuj ecrovid.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Friday, September 19, 2008 ___04:23
ARGH. jus wad have i been doing?
wasting and letting my holidays SLEEP away. get wad i mean? lol.
wasted opputunities when i dont even create them.
-the hunger is constantly building up inside me but yet, im doing nothing to find my food. or fill that void.
-.- do something. pls brian.
bro. quickly move out pls. so i my life pattern can be changed. you're influential. man... it hurts to make me say that. worse, to see you leave.
suddenly have the urge to play. aaaand maaaybe master, the harmonica 0.o
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Tuesday, September 16, 2008 ___01:10
i just cant get enough of Jennifer Aniston. oOooOOh~
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Friday, September 12, 2008 ___06:07
if only i planned ahead. if only i was more enthu about DSA.
but screws the if only's.
this was somewhat meant to be.
make good use of what i have now.
today's horoscope has asked me to plan for my future and set my goals. -.- short-term goals la.
bounce!
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Friday, September 05, 2008 ___12:14
[motivation] desperately needed..
feud with her is done. Syed owned up to me that im a darn romantic pheller. ;) yeah! \/ lame. he dare me to put on blog. now you see it man.
Dance. - for life Soccer-for fun MT-for fierce kick PT- for health Guitar- for soul
mission to improve till holis end.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Monday, August 18, 2008 ___06:04
im really inspired by the late Bruce Lee. He made me feel that there is so much more to learn, understand and do. Making me realise how much flaws I have and how unacceptable they are. His Philosphies...aww man. I actually feel lousy and weak as a human, but that motivates me more to change. And to change i will. Even if i repeat my bad mistakes, il take it in my stride and try again. To be one, living with no regrets but the desire to change and anticipate.
blah. so much for saying changing and changing and changing & changing for the past whole time in my blog and in my life. but i stil repeat them again. but im human, and humans grow-change.
moulding myself or oneself. huge amount of determination is needed to combat complacency and laziness.
the saying - 'the more the merrier (:' is not always true. things have to be balanced out like Yin & Yang. sometimes, there can only be one - 'be a master than a jack of all spades' (not sure if i got it right) but the meaning is basically be good at one thing rather than knowing so many things but good at none.
so choose one.
Cause if you jump... I will jump too... We will fall together. but who shall i fall with?
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, August 06, 2008 ___22:12
After an Eon has past, photos :)
On Top of the World (: still dare to come late? herh-herh-herh~ dun dare liao la (*sobs*)~ztoot-ztoot~ see my retarded smile -.- Lights will guide you home im going back to the start~
motivation.acceleration.dedication
___02:34
Previous post was jus talk but no action. People must be bitten or burnt before they learn their mistake.
my phrase ald
Just been all play but no work. this cannot do. pon sch,late... call urself independent and all grown up. argh!
Must sacrifice and suffer in the cocoon before becoming a behewwwtiful butterfly.
motivation & dedication pls b in me! im ald not in Jc, all the more i should work hard rather than be complacent. -.-
you're the reason in my life...You're(Bruce Lee's body, Rocky's motivation, Subhas Anadan's success in Law plus Worm's love & care) dee Inspiration~!
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, July 23, 2008 ___05:38
Enough of the acting cute on blog.
Projects projects. more projects followed by tests.
Ive decided to be focussed in school now, been pretty lost after orientation or rather stepping into poly. Not sure with how the grading criteria works thus taking everything for granted, my timetable, my lectures, tutorials, punctuality for EVERYTHING. Basically, taking school for granted. First was being too involved in Tri and now Dance.
Shall set my goals and priorities straight, haven been treating school like a dream. Time to wake up.
Dance, theres so much to learn.. but first, stretching of muscles.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, June 25, 2008 ___23:58
Qunnie and Terenncie...think u both very Q-T(cutie) fuck off!!! a blog is where ppl let out thier feelings and shit. this is wad i want to post. dun wan read, fuck off..
nabeh teng teng... __
dence dence!!!
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Monday, June 16, 2008 ___04:58
My Angel from heaven was sent to me not long ago... Finally, have been waiting for The Truth to be revealed. and it does, eventually.. And like i said before, its in my history, what goes around comes around baby...
How does that feel for a change? you two-timing bitch. i never knew what you could do. too bad i didnt hear this shit frm your mouth.
and to believe that i stil tried to be there for you despite what you did behind my back...*spits*
Fuck you.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, June 15, 2008 ___20:49
Presenting B.C. 2008 not Before Christ but Brian Cheok (:
Past: Sports (didnt achieve much in it :P ) .'. Present: Dance (dun stun! rly...u laughin ald! nabei >;s)
sry...long time nvr blog. abit high.
screw projects and screw my hair : CMI
all my hair dresser cant cut LZX hair even with the Face and Photo facing him ( face as in, from the mirror :D) so end up i cut short hair. one word : JIAT
okay bye!
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, April 06, 2008 ___22:12
from :'( --to--> : DD or rather 'chua sai'
id like to thank everyone who came,wished aaaaaaand gave presents
esp. my mum,sis, bro n serene, 5C, simei bro's, Jobel, audrey, jessica. they brightened up my day.or shall i say stunned my day! thank you so much guys appreciate it
indeed a memorable one
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Saturday, April 05, 2008 ___16:47
):
shoutout my ty's to : my dearest sister n family, serene, abigail, audrey, april, samantha, shermaine, iffah, valerie, Jobel, ruth, qiu yan, ernest n kereen, terence, jun qun, jacob
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Wednesday, April 02, 2008 ___02:40
its almost a month since i blogged. a good progress for not blogging.
??TO BE SURPRISED OR BE DISSAPPOINTED??
hope itl b a good one, giving good memories which would sort of mark the beginning of a new journey
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Tuesday, March 04, 2008 ___15:26
im done blogging for good. heh!
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Friday, February 22, 2008 ___12:33
heading seperate ways. Finally, time to move along now. what's there to 'jiat' about. heh!
Another wishful thinking for the try-outs? what ever it is. im gonna do wad i have to do, which i should a long time ago, because i cant run away from the fact of how much i love that game. All i need is a chance for me to prove myself for i know what im worth.
im not in TJ. TP - Law. what a sudden change in life. law...wth. something mus b in store for me.
alot of relflection to do.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Saturday, February 16, 2008 ___02:53
only one word : jiat. =(
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Friday, February 01, 2008 ___01:32
though i didnt acheive the results i really want. r5 - 16 r4 - 13 is pretty much a good score since my prelims was 20 plus. made me think i might do the same for O's English - B3 A.maths - A2 E.maths -A2 Physics -B3 Biology - B3 Humans -B3 Chem - B4 Chinese -C5
sighs. aim was for both maths to be A1 n for phy n bio to be A2. but sadly not. going to start work again next week i guess. need cash again
i very lazy to blog ald. sian.
TJ! TJ! TJ! (thank-you Samir and Malik. i wont forget this favour you have done for me never in my life, i owe you guys one)
maybe not now but in the future?.
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Friday, December 21, 2007 ___08:13
im flying off to Hong Kong pretty soon. And i had a dream last night. If my flight to HK would crash (which i wish it wouldnt cause ive yet to see Disney Land) , and i asked myself...
What would be the thing id regret not doing before i die? It would be not telling you how i feel about you and how much you mean to me.
i wish i would be that first person you'd think of. or rather wish that i could be Ross from F.R.I.E.N.D.S...
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Sunday, December 16, 2007 ___00:21
motivation.acceleration.dedication
Saturday, December 08, 2007 ___04:50
I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine I've been searching but I just don't see the signs I know that it's out there There's got to be something for my soul somewhere
I've been looking for someone to shed some light Not somebody just to get me through the night I could use some direction And I'm open to your suggestions
All I want to do is find a way back into love I can't make it through without a way back into love And if I open my heart again I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
the feeling of emptiness sucks. bottling things up has a limit. theres so many things that are uncertain for me. sighs.
Sad as i am over many and different issues, but looking back at it zooming out, i bet i'm not alone plus, they could be small issues compared to others...
Master Class today - Rock's and Dino's
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still dare to come late?
~ztoot-ztoot~
see my retarded smile -.-.JPG)
Lights will guide you home+%5Bzoomed+B2%5D.jpg)
im going back to the start~
